Boyfriend's Abuse
the time to say I’m sorry when he comes back home. He leaves for days and days and
then when he comes home he thinks things are all ok fine and he goes on about how
things are normal but I am all twisted inside and then sometimes he will tell me to do
things and when I don’t want to he will hit me then say he’s sorry. Then he threatens
to leave me for a better girlfriend. He does this a lot and all the time. I love him but I
am tired of him doing this to me. What can I do?
Paula: age 22, never married, works in fast-food service.
Dr. Gomes: Paula, I don't even know where to begin because I'm worried for you. If your
friends know the truth they would be worried too and doing something to help you. Clearly this is
not a healthy situation for either of you. While no one can make you leave this relationship until
you are ready, your boyfriend’s behavior shows that he is trying to get you to leave. You need to
know that this is not your only or best choice in life. You have some work to do to know what is
a healthy relationship as well as how to protect yourself now! When you are safe, focus on
identifying how you got yourself in this relationship to prevent this pattern from occurring in the
future.
Suggestion: Do this now! Call either the National Domestic Violence Hotline 800-799-SAFE
(7233) or the Seattle area Crisis Clinic 866-4CRISIS.
Larry Star: Ok, after I read your letter, I had a huge, sharp, stabbing pain behind my eyeballs.
Run-on sentences make my head hurt. Your age, both physically and emotionally is shining
through loud and clear. Your boyfriend sounds like a real freaking train wreck. Here’s my advice:
Get a few bottles of Self-Esteem—you can purchase them at your local inconvenience store.
They come in pill form or gel caps. It’ll be on the shelf right next to the Stop-Wallowing-In-Self-
Pity body spray. Try swallowing that huge pill in front of a mirror. Then pack your bags and head
for Albuquerque. You will feel better in no time.
Suggestion: Listen to Pat Benatar's "Hit Me With Your Best Shot".
Both Ends: In our own style, we are strongly urging Paula to get herself to a safe place. We are
also seeing that learning about patterns and self-esteem will help her be more healthfully proactive
in choosing worthy partners. The bottom line is: Ask for help now!
the time to say I’m sorry when he comes back home. He leaves for days and days and
then when he comes home he thinks things are all ok fine and he goes on about how
things are normal but I am all twisted inside and then sometimes he will tell me to do
things and when I don’t want to he will hit me then say he’s sorry. Then he threatens
to leave me for a better girlfriend. He does this a lot and all the time. I love him but I
am tired of him doing this to me. What can I do?
Paula: age 22, never married, works in fast-food service.
Dr. Gomes: Paula, I don't even know where to begin because I'm worried for you. If your
friends know the truth they would be worried too and doing something to help you. Clearly this is
not a healthy situation for either of you. While no one can make you leave this relationship until
you are ready, your boyfriend’s behavior shows that he is trying to get you to leave. You need to
know that this is not your only or best choice in life. You have some work to do to know what is
a healthy relationship as well as how to protect yourself now! When you are safe, focus on
identifying how you got yourself in this relationship to prevent this pattern from occurring in the
future.
Suggestion: Do this now! Call either the National Domestic Violence Hotline 800-799-SAFE
(7233) or the Seattle area Crisis Clinic 866-4CRISIS.
Larry Star: Ok, after I read your letter, I had a huge, sharp, stabbing pain behind my eyeballs.
Run-on sentences make my head hurt. Your age, both physically and emotionally is shining
through loud and clear. Your boyfriend sounds like a real freaking train wreck. Here’s my advice:
Get a few bottles of Self-Esteem—you can purchase them at your local inconvenience store.
They come in pill form or gel caps. It’ll be on the shelf right next to the Stop-Wallowing-In-Self-
Pity body spray. Try swallowing that huge pill in front of a mirror. Then pack your bags and head
for Albuquerque. You will feel better in no time.
Suggestion: Listen to Pat Benatar's "Hit Me With Your Best Shot".
Both Ends: In our own style, we are strongly urging Paula to get herself to a safe place. We are
also seeing that learning about patterns and self-esteem will help her be more healthfully proactive
in choosing worthy partners. The bottom line is: Ask for help now!
